Dementia - support for people who live alone

Caring for someone with dementia who lives alone can be difficult and, at times, overwhelming. Many organisations provide services for people with dementia and for their families and carers. As soon as a diagnosis is made, it is a good idea to find out as much as you can about dementia and the help and support that is available.

Local dementia organisations and helplines can be a useful starting point. They often offer accurate information, support, advice and counselling, and many produce brochures and fact sheets in a range of community languages.

Living alone with dementia#

Each person with dementia is unique, and so is their living situation. While many people live with a partner or in some kind of family arrangement, an increasing number live alone. This may be by choice or by circumstance.

Whatever the reason, it creates particular challenges for the people who care for them. A diagnosis of dementia does not automatically mean a person is unable to care for themselves. Helping someone stay in the familiar surroundings of their own home for as long as possible is a worthwhile goal, but it can be a source of worry for family and friends.

The type of support needed depends on the situation. Someone living alone may, for example:

• develop unrealistic ideas or suspicions, which can cause friction with neighbours or others
• forget to feed or care for pets
• forget to eat, bathe or change their clothes regularly
• lack awareness of hazards such as fire or electrical appliances
• show poor judgement about who they let into the house

Some of these situations can be managed fairly simply. If the person is forgetting to eat, for instance, it may help to arrange delivered meals and have someone phone or visit to remind them to eat. Other situations may put the person’s safety and wellbeing at risk, in which case a move to more supervised care may need to be considered.

How carers and families can help#

Important things that carers and families can do to support a person with dementia who lives alone include:

• Accepting a degree of risk. What counts as acceptable risk should be reviewed regularly by family members and health professionals, while also respecting the wishes of the person with dementia.
• Involving the family. Organise a family meeting at an early stage to work out what each person can offer, now and in the future.
• Improving household safety. Make sure the home is well lit and free of hazards such as faulty kitchen appliances, loose carpets or unsteady furniture.
• Providing aids to independence, such as handrails near the bath, shower and toilet, easy-to-read clocks and large calendars to help with orientation, personal alarms or monitoring systems, and reminder timers (particularly for medications).
• Managing finances. Get legal and financial advice while the person can still take part in the decisions.
• Telling others. Explain the person’s condition and provide contact numbers to trusted friends, neighbours and others nearby. Make sure the person carries adequate identification and an emergency contact number when they go out.

Support groups#

Support groups for people with dementia and for their families and carers exist in many communities. Many people gain enormous comfort and practical help from meeting others who share similar experiences.

Carer support groups bring relatives and friends together regularly under the guidance of a facilitator, often a health professional or someone with firsthand experience of caring for a family member. There is usually no charge for attending. A local dementia helpline can help you find your nearest group.

Counselling#

Specialist counselling services for people with dementia, family members and carers provide an opportunity to talk through emotional, practical and family issues in confidence.

Health services#

Health services that offer help and support include:

• Your family doctor, who is often the first person people talk to about their concerns. A doctor can assess the person and arrange referrals.
• Specialist cognitive and memory assessment services, which provide expert assessment and diagnosis for people with memory loss or changes in their thinking. A family doctor can refer you, or you may be able to contact such services directly.
• Aged or community care assessment teams, made up of doctors, social workers and other health professionals, who can help work out what kind of care will best meet a person’s needs when extra assistance is required.
• Other services such as physiotherapy, podiatry, speech therapy and occupational therapy, which can help people with dementia and advise their carers.

Home support services#

Many services offer extra support to help people live more comfortably at home. Commonly used options include home-delivered meals, home nursing and help with medication, and advice on home modifications to promote safe living.

Respite care#

Taking a break is often known as respite. Respite gives family members a chance to rest and gives the person with dementia an opportunity to take part in social or recreational activities.

Respite can be provided in local day-activity centres, some of which offer specialised activities for people with dementia. The amount of care ranges from a few hours to several days a week, and some centres offer weekend or overnight care.

Another option is in-home respite, where a respite carer comes to the person’s home or takes them to an activity they enjoy. This lets the family do things outside the house or simply take a break. Respite can also be arranged in an emergency, or for a longer period in a residential facility.

If you have concerns about care#

If you have a concern about the care you or someone else is receiving, it is important to talk about it. Complaints can help care providers improve their services and quality of care. One complaint can help other people as well as your own loved one. Ask your provider or a relevant complaints body how to raise your concern.

Key points#

• Find out about available help and services as soon as a diagnosis of dementia is made.
• People with dementia who live alone face particular risks, but many can stay at home with the right support.
• Carer support groups and counselling can offer both practical help and comfort.
• Home support, respite care and health services can help people live more comfortably at home.

Where to get help#